A Slightly Warped British Invasion
by Erin T. Aardvark
Summary: The Impossibles meet a singing duo from England, with a very strange sense of humor


_AUTHOR'S NOTE: Another Camp Monkee Mallard rehash. However, this one is no longer on my site. After my last three Impossibles story, I figure it's time for one that's played out mostly for laughs. And this one definitely does it. As always, the Impossibles and Big D belong to Hanna-Barbera. Everyone else you encounter is mine._

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The Impossibles were on another whirlwind tour, playing sold out concerts and busting the criminal element here and there. Their tour brought them to San Francisco. They were backstage at another sold out concert getting ready. Multi and Fluey were checking over the amps, and Coiley was in the dressing room, tuning up, when there was a knock at the dressing room door. It was stage manager of the venue they were playing.

"I hate to bother you, Mr. Collins, since you go on in five minutes," he said, using Coiley's real name (which was Calvin Collins). "But there are two guys out here and they want to see you."

"Okay," Coiley said, as he continued tuning his guitar. "Let 'em in."

The stage manager shrugged and motioned for somebody to come in. Two young men with Beatle-esque haircuts walked in. One wore thick, black framed glasses, and both men had brown hair, but the one who wore glasses had a slightly lighter shade of hair color than his friend. In fact, they resembled the singing duo Chad and Jeremy.

"Hello, hello!" the one without glasses shouted, in a British accent. "How goes everything? Everything all right?"

"Bit of the all right, all right!" the one with glasses shouted, (in another British accent) punching Coiley on the shoulder, playfully.

"Uhhh . . . . ." Coiley said, not knowing quite what to make of these guys.

"We want to make you an offer, mates," the first guy said. "Seeing is how you're the leader of a very popular rock group you understand."

"Uh huh," Coiley said.

"We want to be rock stars so we want you to give our record to your record company so we can be famous."

"Yeah," Coiley said, feeling a little confused. "Okay. First of all, I don't know who the heck you guys are."

"Oh, of course, of course!" the Englishman shouted. "Where are me manners?! I'm Chad, and he's Irving. We call ourselves Chad and Irving. And we're from London."

"Chad and Irving?" Coiley asked.

"Yeah, well, Chad and Jeremy was already taken," Chad said.

"Yeah," Irving (the one with the glasses) said. "So you gonna give us a chance or what?"

"Yeah, okay," Coiley said. "I'll tell you what. I'll listen to the record, and I'll see what I can do."

"Well all right, then!" Chad said.

"Bit of the all right, all right!" Irving shouted.

"Just to give you a preview," Chad went on, "we sound a bit like the Beatles."

"I wanna hold your hand and all that," Irving replied. "Well, we'll see you later. Call us if you like the record! You could make us big!"

With that, Chad and Irving left, leaving Coiley somewhat speechless. He looked at the demo record the two Englishmen gave him when Multi and Fluey walked in.

"Hey, Coiley, you ready?" Fluey asked.

"In a second," Coiley said. "I need your portable record player, Fluey."

"What do you need it for?" Multi asked, as Fluey left the venue to go retrieve his portable turntable from the Impossi-Mobile.

"Two guys were just in here and they gave me their demo," Coiley explained. "They want us to give it to our label."

A few moments later, Fluey returned with his turntable. Coiley put the demo on it, and the boys gave it a listen.

"Not bad," Coiley said. "They've got potential."

"Yeah, but we can't give the thing to our record label," Fluey said. "We're not _on_ an official label! Our music is mostly handled by Phyllis and the girls."

"We'll think about what to do later," Multi said. "Right now, it's show time!"

And with that, the Impossibles went out on stage and performed for their San Francisco fans.

The next day, the Impossibles met up with Shawn, FG, and Danalleah (who were on tour with the boys as their opening act). Coiley set up the record on Fluey's turntable and turned to the girls.

"Listen to this," he said. He turned it on and the girls listened to it.

"Not bad," Shawn said. "That your new demo?"

"No," Coiley said. "A new group dropped that off and wanted us to hear it."

"Who are they?" Danalleah asked.

"Chad and Irving," Fluey said.

"Chad and Irving?" FG repeated. "You mean Chad and Jeremy."

"No, Chad and Irving."

"Someone call?" a British voice called out. The sixsome looked and there were Chad and Irving walking up to them.

"Hello, mates!" Chad shouted. "How are you doing? All right?"

"Bit of the all right, all right!" Irving shouted.

"Uhh, yeah," Fluey said.

"Forgive Irving," Chad said. "He's a bit of an excitable one, he is."

"Well so are you Chad, ol' boy, so are you!" Irving said.

"They're nice guys, really," Coiley said. "Just a little strange."

"Well, well, look at what we've got," Chad said. He grabbed Multi's hand and started shaking it. "Mark Mills! It's a great honor meeting one of the greatest singers of the world. It's a real treat! A real treat!"

"Uh huh," Multi said, pulling his hand away. Then he turned to Coiley. "I see what you mean."

Coiley shrugged. Chad and Irving then turned to Fluey.

"Whoa!" Irving said. "It's incredible! Franky McAlister himself!"

"Yeah, well," Fluey said. Suddenly, Irving dropped to his knees and began bowing before Fluey.

"We are not worthy! We are not worthy!" he shouted.

"What is _that_?" Shawn asked, pointing at Irving, oddly.

"That's Irving," Coiley said.

"Oh, well, Irv, can I call you Irv?" Fluey asked.

"You can call me anything except late for dinner!" Irving shouted.

"Yeah, okay, Irv," Fluey said. "Uhh, would you mind getting up? You're slobbering all over my boots."

"Oh, I slobbered on Franky McAlister's boots!" Irving yelled. "Oh I feel so honored!"

Chad then noticed the girls staring at him, and Irving.

"Oh, look, Irving! Look!" he shouted. "Three of the most beautiful birds in the world!"

"Oh a sight of beauty, that is!" Irving said.

"I say, it's a great honor to be in the presence of such lovely ladies!" Chad shouted,

"Uh yeah," Shawn said, yanking Chad's hand out of his. Then she threw Multi a look that clearly said, "what is up with these two?"

"Hey, hey, look at this, Irving!" Chad shouted, and he picked up Skittles from the Impossi-Mobile. "Have you ever seen a more adorable little pooch?"

"That's Skittles," Multi said, taking his dog from Chad for the moment. "She's our mascot.

"Awww, now isn't that just lovely!" Irving shouted. Then he turned to the boys. "Give us a hug, blokes!"

Irving jumped, but Multi and Fluey side stepped him and hit the wall. Irving stood up and laughed.

"Oh-ho-ho, blokeys!" he shouted. "You're a riot!"

"Yeah, we gotta split," Fluey said, then he turned to Coiley. "Hey, uhh, Coiley . . . . . they aren't, you know . . . . . high are they?"

"Perish the thought!" Chad shouted. "We're clean!"

"Yeah, they're just a little weird, is all," Coiley said.

"Well coming from a yank like you, Calvin Collins, that's a compliment!" Irving shouted.

"Uh huh," Coiley said, nodding.

"Weird nothing," Shawn said. "These guys are downright bizarre!"

"Hear that, Chad?" Irving asked. "We're bizarre!"

"Well, we try," Chad said.

The Impossibles, Skittles, and the girls just looked at each other. Then Chad noticed their demo on the portable turntable.

"Did you listen to our song?" he asked.

"What do you think?" Irving asked.

"I liked it," Danalleah said.

"Yeah, very Beatle-esque," Shawn said.

"You guys got something here," Fluey said. "But we can't give it to our label."

"Why not?" Irving asked.

"It's sort of a . . . . ." Coiley said, trying to come up with an excuse. "Sort of a private label, you know. They don't take just anyone."

"Can't you give us an audition or something like that?" Chad asked.

"Well . . . . ." Coiley said. "I'll see what I can do, all right?"

"All right," Chad said.

"Bit of the all right, all right!" Irving shouted. "Thanks, mate!"

With that, Chad and Irving were off. Coiley then grabbed his guitar and called Big D's secretary, Phyllis, and told her about Chad and Irving and their slight problem. Phyllis agreed to come out to San Francisco and pose as their manager or something. Coiley got in contact with Chad and Irving and the group met at Fisherman's Wharf the next morning. Chad and Irving were excited, but they weren't as amped up as they had been. And that seemed to relax the others. In fact, they got into a jam session with the Impossibles while they were waiting on Phyllis. She arrived shortly after the jam session started.

"Hi, guys," she said. "Are these the guys?"

"Yeah," Coiley said. "Phyllis Dawson, meet Chad and Irving."

"Chad and Irving?" Phyllis asked. "Shouldn't it be Chad and Jeremy?"

"No, Chad and Irving is right," Coiley said. "They're trying to plug a demo of theirs."

"Oh," Phyllis said, still a little confused. "Whatever you say, Coiley."

"Yeah, all right," Coiley said.

"Bit of the all right, all right!" Irving shouted.

"He's always doing that whenever you say all right," Chad explained. "He's a bit of an excitable one, he is."

"Uh huh," Shawn said, a little intimidated.

"I think they're a little out there, you know?" FG said.

"Yeah, you should've seen 'em yesterday!" Fluey shouted.

"But it's okay," Coiley said. "They're clean."

"Hear that, Chad?" Irving asked. "We're clean!"

"Well, of course we are!" Chad shouted. "We take a shower every morning!"

"This morning we took it to Cleveland!"

Chad and Irving cracked up at their joke. The group just nodded. It took awhile to get used to Chad and Irving's senses of humors. But once you got used to them, they were pretty decent guys.

After introductions, the group went to the hotel the Impossibles and the girls were staying in while they were in San Francisco. When they got to the boys' room, Irving went over to a bowl of fruit that was sitting on a table.

"Coil . . . . I mean, Calvin played me your demo," Phyllis said. "I liked it a lot, but I really don't think it's a good idea to give it to our, umm . . . . label."

"Why not?" Chad asked.

"It's . . . . . kind of a long story," Phyllis said. She didn't necessarily want to tell Chad and Irving that the Impossibles were undercover superheroes, and that their "label" wasn't really a record label at all.

"Is it because we're a bit turned on?" Chad asked. "I admit, we can be pretty intimidating when we get started. We just take a little getting used to. Isn't that right, Irving?"

Irving turned around and the others saw that he had grapes in his eyes and nose, and a watermelon rhine in his mouth. He was also growling like an alien from outer space.

"Oh boy," Chad said. "Irving, knock that off! Forgive him, blokes. He's a bit of an actor, he is!"

"What is he, one of those method actors?" Fluey asked.

"Apparently so," Coiley replied.

Irving just laughed and took the fruit out of his eyes, nose, and mouth, then he took a couple of bows. The others had to laugh.

"You know, Irving, you're nuttier than they are!" Phyllis said, indicating the boys.

"Then you like us, then?" Irving asked.

"Well, yeah, I guess so," Multi said, shrugging.

"Then why _don't_ you let us on your label?" Chad asked.

"We just can't," Coiley said. "And we can't explain why, either."

That afternoon, Chad and Irving had a nice long talk about the whole situation at their rented apartment.

"You had to pick a group who hates British music," Irving said.

"Don't blame it all on me," Chad said. "And they said they liked the song!"

"I know, mate, I know. But I still can't get over the fact that they won't tell us why they won't let us on their label."

"Well, not everybody gets signed, Irv. You know that."

"Yeah, I know. I know."

Irving paced around the room for a bit. Then he paced up the wall and across the ceiling, and did the whole thing over again.

"You put double sided tape on the soles of your shoes again, didn't you?" Chad asked, watching him.

"I think better when I'm upside down," Irving said, stopping on the ceiling for a moment.

"What do you need to think about?"

"Well, maybe we can scare them into signing us on their label."

"Oh no. Irving, no. No way. No how."

"Oh come on, Chad!"

"We can't force someone to do what we want them to do!"

"Well, we can try can't we?"

"Well, I suppose it would be all right to have a bit of sport with the lads, eh?"

"Exactly, exactly! You know, have a bit of fun! Bring one of 'em over here and play some music. Let's get the car and . . . ."

"Irv! We don't have a car!"

"We don't?"

"No, we don't. We hitch hiked from the airport!"

"Oh. Then we'll use their car, then."

"No, I have a better idea. It'll be more fun."

"Oh goody! More fun!"

Irving clapped his hands. He and Chad left the apartment, discussing their plan.

The next night, the two of them were walking around town, pushing a shopping car down the street. Chad was wearing roller skates as well. They spotted the Impossibles and the girls walking around, talking about their tour. Chad and Irving then ran down the street with the shopping cart.

"Beebeep!" Irving shouted, as he and Chad threw the cart into the group. They saw it coming and tried to duck out of the way, but only resulted into getting in each other's way, and they all crashed to the ground. And if that wasn't bad enough, they also found they were a bit tangled in each other's arms and legs. Only Coiley and Skittles managed to not have been in that mess.

"You guys okay?" Coiley asked.

"Now I know what a meatball in a spaghetti dinner feels like!" Fluey shouted.

"This is like a game of Doctor, Doctor We Need Help gone wrong!" Shawn shouted.

Coiley wanted to help them, but he couldn't resist cracking up at the sight of Multi, Fluey, and the girls tangled up in one another trying to get out without hurting themselves. Multi tried to pull his leg out, but it didn't work out to well.

"Ow, ow, ow! Man watch it, Multi!" Fluey shouted. "Be careful, will ya?!"

"I'm being as careful as I can!" Multi yelled.

"Oooh!" FG yelled. "Shawn! Your high heeled boot is stabbing me in the back!"

"Sorry," Shawn said.

"Oh boy, this is too hilarious!" Coiley shouted, cracking up.

"Oh ha, ha, ha, Coiley," Fluey said, glaring at his blond bandmate. "Stop laughing and give us a hand!"

"Okay."

Coiley was still laughing a little, but he walked over and tried to help his friends out of their predicament. Of course while he was trying to do that, Chad and Irving came back up the street. Chad was pushing the shopping cart and Irving was riding in the front.

"Target coming up!" he shouted.

"Full speed ahead!" Chad yelled.

They approached the Impossibles. The three of them were so engrossed with trying to get untangled they didn't notice Chad and Irving coming up. At least not until Irving grabbed Coiley's shoulders and threw him into the shopping cart. Then they took off.

"Now what was _that_?!" Shawn shouted.

"The fastest get away in the world, is my guess," Multi said.

"Come on!" Fluey shouted. "We've got to go after them!"

"One problem with that, Fluey," FG said. "We're a mangled, tangled mess!"

"Okay, then let's get _un_tangled and _then_ go after them!" Fluey shouted.

The others seemed to agree that was the best solution, but it was easier said than done.

"This reminds me of the last time we all got together and played Twister," Danalleah said. "Didn't these same results happen?"

"More or less," Multi said.

"All right, all right," Shawn said. "Let's try this a different way. Danalleah, you're the smallest, so you try to get yourself out first, then FG, then me, then Fluey. Okay?"

"Okay," the others said in unison. And then they got to work untangling again.

In the meantime, Chad and Irving were rolling down the street as fast as they could. Coiley was gripping the sides of the shopping cart, practically scared senseless at the pace. The three of them were heading directly for a large truck.

"Hey, hey, look out for the truck!" he shouted.

"What truck?" Chad asked.

"Behind the bus!" Coiley yelled.

"What bus?" Irving asked.

"I can't watch!" Coiley shouted, slapping his hand over his eyes.

"Beebeep!" Irving yelled, and he and Chad swerved, missing the truck and the bus by about 1/4 of an inch!

"Is it over?" Coiley asked.

"You can look now, bloke," Irving said.

Coiley looked and breathed a sigh of relief. At least until Chad and Irving came across a very big hill.

"Oh look at that!" Irving shouted. "I just love going down big hills!"

"Geronimo!" Chad shouted.

"Down hill?!" Coiley shouted. Then Chad and Irving started to take off.

Now the thing with going down a big hill as fast as you can is it's very hard to stop. Especially when you're on wheels and you don't have any brakes. So the shopping cart went through a red light, and that caused a few collisions, due to the drivers trying to stop to avoid hitting it.

"We just ran a red light!" Coiley shouted.

"This is no time to be a back seat driver!" Irving reprimanded.

"How can he be a backseat driver?" Chad asked. "He's up front!"

"This is no time to be a front seat driver!" Irving yelled.

"Oh good grief," Coiley moaned.

Chad and Irving then passed an alley where a police car was sitting, just waiting for somebody to bust for speeding. The two cops caught sight of the shopping cart flying past the alley.

"Hey, Jim," one said. "Did you just see what I just saw?"

"You mean those three guys going eighty miles an hour in that shopping cart, Pete?" Jim asked.

"Yeah."

"No."

"Okay. Good. Then I didn't see it either."

Suddenly, Multi, Fluey, and the girls drove up to the cops in the Impossi-Mobile.

"Did you fellas see three guys in a speeding shopping cart go by?" Fluey asked.

"They went thattaway," Jim said.

"Thanks!"

The two Impossibles and the girls then drove off. Jim and Pete watched them run down the street chasing the speeding shopping cart.

"Maybe we oughta switch to decaf," Pete said.

"They are never gonna believe us at the station," Jim replied, shaking his head.

As the Impossi-Mobile was speeding along after the runaway shopping cart, it began to sputter, until it stopped dead.

"Great, we're out of fuel," Fluey groaned.

"Now what?" FG asked. "We're going to lose the shopping cart if we stop now!"

"You girls push the car to a gas station or something," Fluey said. "Multi and I will go after the shopping cart."

The girls agreed, and they began pushing the Impossi-Mobile while Multi and Fluey ran in the direction of where the shopping cart had supposedly gone.

Meanwhile, Chad and Irving were still racing down San Francisco. Coiley was basically just drumming his fingers on the sides of the shopping cart. Irving spotted a McDonald's across the street.

"Hey, Chad," he said. "I'm hungry. You hungry?"

"Yeah, I'm hungry," Chad said. Then he turned to Coiley. "You hungry, kid?"

"Huh?" Coiley asked, confused. But he had to admit, he was hungry. "Yeah, now that you mention it."

"Okay, pull into the Mickey D's," Chad said.

"Go through the drive through, it's faster," Irving said.

"Right-o."

Chad and Irving swung the shopping cart into the drive through and placed an order. Coiley ran a hand through his hair.

"This is incredible," he said.

Chad and Irving pulled up to the other window, and realized they were two bucks short.

"Hey, bloke," Chad said to Coiley. "You got two bucks on you?"

"Yeah," Coiley said, reaching for his wallet. He pulled out two bucks and handed it to Chad.

"Thanks, gov," he said. Then he handed the bag of food to Coiley and were off again. The girl in the window turned to her friend.

"That was the weirdest thing," she said.

"What?" her friend asked.

"Three guys pulled up, ordered three hamburgers, three Cokes, and three orders of fries, and pulled out in a shopping cart!"

"Shopping cart?"

The girl nodded. The other guy shrugged and went back to work. Chad and Irving in the meantime, were sorting things out. Irving was sitting on the handle of the shopping cart while Chad drove (don't ask how he didn't lose his balance).

"Don't go too fast, Chad," Irving said. "I'm holding your Coke and my Coke at the same time!"

"Okay," Chad said. "Hey, kid, check to make sure they got everything, all right?"

Coiley nodded and searched through the contents of the McDonald's bag.

"Oh nuts," he said. "They forgot the ketchup!"

"Well, we'll just get some," Chad said. "There's a grocery right there!"

"Pass me a french fry, mate," Irving said as he and Chad turned the shopping cart into the grocery store, nearly running over innocent bystanders.

"Beebeep!" Irving shouted.

"Well, if you can't beat 'em," Coiley said, shrugging.

Coiley grabbed a bottle of ketchup off the shelf and Chad and Irving made a beeline for the checkout. Coiley pulled out his wallet and handed it to Irving, who paid for the ketchup, and then they were off again. Coiley opened the ketchup bottle and dunked a french fry in it.

In the meantime, Multi, Fluey, and Skittles reached the McDonald's and ran through the drive through.

"Did you see three guys in a shopping cart go by?" Fluey asked the girl in the window.

"Shopping cart? Yeah, they went that way," the girl said.

"Great, thanks," Fluey said. "Come on Multi!"

And with that, Multi, Fluey, and Skittles raced off. The girl stared after them.

"That's it! I quit!" she shouted.

On and on the chase went. Chad did most of the driving. The whole situation was really confusing to Coiley.

"This is incredible," he said. "I've been in dire situations before, but _this_ is just ridiculous!"

Chad and Irving didn't say anything. They just continued rolling down the street in the shopping cart. Finally, Multi, Fluey, and Skittles caught up with them.

"Uh oh," Irving said. "We got company."

"We'll just have to lose them then," Chad said.

"Right. Let's play in traffic."

"Wait a minute!" Coiley shouted, but Chad and Irving didn't listen. They came across a busy intersection and zipped right through it.

"Beebeep!" Irving yelled. Coiley groaned and slapped his hand over his eyes. This was starting to get on his nerves.

Multi, Fluey, and Skittles stopped. No way they wanted to attempt crossing a busy street like this! And their transformers were in the glove compartment of the Impossi-Mobile.

"Well, we lost the shopping cart," Multi said.

"I think we may have to take this to a higher level," Fluey said. "We're gonna have to tell the police!"

The boys went directly to the police station, and told the entire story, word for word, to the chief.

"Uh huh," was all the chief had to say.

"I'm serious!" Fluey shouted. "Two English guys came running past us with a shopping cart, knocked into the three of us, grabbed our friend and took off down the street, and we tailed 'em to a McDonald's and a grocery store, and we finally lost 'em in traffic . . . . . . . . boy, even _I_ don't believe this!"

"No kidding, officer," Multi said. "I saw it too!"

The chief looked at the three of them for a few moments and then clicked his tongue against his teeth.

"All I've got to say is this," he said, and pointed to Fluey. "I think _you_ need an eye exam . . . ."

Then he said, pointing to Multi, "And _you_ need a haircut to get all that hair out of your face so you can see properly!"

Multi heaved a frustrated sigh and Fluey stifled the urge to clobber the cop! Just as they were trying to figure out how to make their story sound better, the two cops that they ran into walked in.

"Ticket anybody tonight?" the chief asked.

"Nope," Jim said. "I mean, if you saw a speeding shopping cart, would you ticket it?"

"Yeah, who'd believe it?" Pete said.

"A shopping cart?" the chief asked.

"Told ya so," Fluey grumbled.

"Looks like you boys have a case," the chief said. "Would you say these two English guys are dangerous?"

"It's hard to say," Multi said. "Personally, I think they're out of their minds."

"Yeah, man, way out there," Fluey said. "I mean cuckoosville. Completely whacko. Totally loon crazy. About as nutty as a squirrel banquet."

"I get the idea," the chief said before Fluey could go any further. "If these guys are that crazy, who knows what they're capable of. Men, gather some of the crew. We're going to find that shopping cart!"

Multi, Fluey, and Skittles followed the cops out of the police station, wondering how in the world they were going to explain _this_ to Big D. No way the chief would believe it!

Anyway, Chad and Irving made it back to their apartment. They led Coiley into the bedroom.

"Okay, what's the deal?" Coiley asked.

"We're gonna give you one more chance to sign us to your record label," Chad said. "You've got one hour to decide."

"Here," Irving said, handing him the leftover french fries and a Coke. "No sense trying to decide on an empty stomach, gov."

Coiley just nodded. Chad and Irving left the room and locked the door behind them. Then Irving went over to the closet and dug around.

"What are we gonna do in an hour?" Chad asked.

"Scare him a bit," Irving said. He pulled a gun from the closet. "I've been looking for this baby. All I've got to do is load it."

"Whoa, whoa, hold it! You're . . . . . you're not gonna . . . ."

"Chad, it's a water pistol. See?"

Irving filled the gun with water and pulled the trigger. A stream of water shot out of it.

"Oh," Chad said.

"If he says he's not gonna sign us, I'll squirt him, and then we'll tell him we were just having a bit of sport."

"All right, then."

"Bit of the all right, all right!"

"Why do you always do that?"

"It's a reflex."

An hour went by. Chad and Irving walked into the bedroom. Coiley stood up and faced them.

"Well, bloke," Chad said. "What's it gonna be?"

"Look," Coiley said. "I admire your perseverance, but I can't give your demo to the head of our label. I can't explain why, either. It's just something you're gonna have to accept, you know?"

"Yeah, we know," Chad said.

"You're a nice kid, Collins," Irving said. Then he held up his gun. Coiley panicked. "I really hate to do this to you."

"Wait, wait a minute!" Coiley shouted, backing away. "Let's talk this over! I mean just because I can't do anything about your demo, I mean, that's no reason to kill me!"

Coiley backed into the wall and squeezed his eyes shut. Irving pulled the trigger and a stream of water blasted the blond Impossible in the face. He spat it out and looked at the two Englishmen, laughing their heads off.

"That was just a water pistol?!" he shouted.

"Oh, you should've seen your face!" Chad laughed. "Pure panic, that!"

"We were just having a bit of fun!" Irving shouted. "You know, a bit of sport."

"Fun, huh?" Coiley asked, sounding highly annoyed. "Well, personally, I don't see anything fun about this! You guys scare me half to death, try to threaten me to sign you guys, and then try to kill me using a water gun, and then you tell me you were just kidding! That is a pretty cruel joke, you two!"

"We're sorry," Chad said. "But, really, we were just having a bit of fun."

"Yeah," Irving said. "Besides, if we were serious about this whole thing, we wouldn't have used that shopping cart."

Coiley glared at the two Englishmen, and then thought over the situation. Looking back on it, he began to laugh. Then, he groaned and shook his head.

"You are possible the wackiest Brits I've ever met!" he laughed.

"Coming from you, Collins, that's a compliment," Chad said. "Come on, mate. Let's head out of here."

The three of them were about to leave when suddenly sirens filled the air. They ran to the window and saw about a dozen police cars surrounding the building. Fluey and Multi were with them.

"All right, you lousy limeys!" the chief shouted. "This is the police! Come out with your hands up!"

"Hey, who you calling a limey, copper?!" Irving shouted.

"I repeat! Come out with your hands up!"

"Never! You'll never take us alive, copper!"

With that, Irving ran into the bathroom and came out carrying a water balloon. He threw it out the window and it clobbered Pete.

"Eeeccchhhh!" he shouted.

"Take that, cop!" Irving shouted.

"Forgive him, Calvin," Chad said. "He's a bit over dramatic, he is!"

"So I've noticed," Coiley said. "Let me talk to them."

Coiley went over to the window and looked down.

"Guys!" he called. "Hold it a sec! It's just a misunderstanding!"

"BANZAI!" Irving shouted, and he threw a huge water balloon out the window, splattering Multi and Fluey with it.

"Hey!" Fluey shouted.

"What the heck is going on?" Shawn shouted, as she, FG, and Danalleah arrived on the scene in the Impossi-Mobile.

"Never mind," Fluey said, and he dug his transformer out of the car's glove compartment and pushed the button on it. In a swirl of green and blue, Fluey transformed into his superhero alter ego. Multi did the same.

Chad finally had enough of this. He was worried someone would get hurt, so he walked downstairs and approached Multi.

"Mark, we need to talk," he said.

"About what?" Multi asked, holding a water balloon.

"This was all just a big misunderstanding. All we were doing was having a bit of fun with Calvin."

"Fun?"

"Yeah, we didn't mean any harm."

"I'd better go tell Fluey. The cops aren't gonna be happy about this, since it's a false alarm."

Multi and Chad began to walk back over to the scene, only to be met with a huge water balloon.

"Hey, Irving!" Chad shouted. "Cut it out! What are you doing up there?!"

"Time to break out the heavy artillery," Irving said.

Irving then took a bucket full of water balloons and emptied it out the window, splattering everyone down below. Then, he went to get another water balloon, but he slipped on a wet spot on the floor, which sent the water balloon flying. It not only ended up soaking Coiley, but the electric chord of a lamp on the table as well. And everybody knows water and electricity don't mix. There were some sparks, and finally a flame. And that grew to one huge fire. Pretty soon, the entire building was in flames. The tenants were running all over the place, screaming.

"We've got to restore order or else nobody's gonna get out of here," Irving said. Coiley stuck two fingers in his mouth and let out the shrillest whistle known to man.

"Okay, everybody, listen up!" he shouted. "We need a little order here!"

"The nearest fire escape is this way," Irving said. "Follow us!"

Irving led the group to a window where the fire escape was. They made sure everybody else in the building got out first before they went ahead. But a beam from the ceiling crashed in front of the window and there was no way around it.

"We can't go out that way!" Irving shouted.

"And we can't go down the stairs, either," Coiley said. "Looks like the only way out is up."

Irving nodded and he and Coiley dashed for the stairs, covering their noses and mouths, making sure they didn't breath in the smoke. They made it to the roof of the building, but then had no way of getting down.

"Now what?" Irving asked.

"Good question," Coiley said. Then he looked down. "Oh boy, we're a long way up!"

"Yeah, that's for sure!" Irving shouted, looking down himself.

Fluey and FG were doing all they could to control the fire, but it was too much for them. They both went down to the others to report.

"We can't handle it," Fluey said, breathlessly. "It's too much!"

"Don't worry," Shawn said. "Here comes the fire department."

"What's going on here?" one of the firemen asked.

"It's a long story," Multi said.

"Is everybody out of the building?" another fireman asked, coming over.

"Almost," Shawn said, looking through a pair of binoculars. "Coiley and Irving are trapped on the roof."

"Yeah, we've got two people on the roof, and that building looks like it's gonna collapse any minute!" Fluey shouted.

The two firemen ran over to the engine. They had to activate the ladder. But unfortunately, the building was a bit too high for the ladders. And nobody could get too near the building anyway without getting burned.

"How are we gonna get them down?" the firemen asked.

"I have an idea," Multi said. "I'll take care of this."

The fireman was about to ask, but he didn't get a chance. He just grabbed Coiley's transformer from the Impossi-Mobile, and duplicated upward.

"Coiley, catch!" he shouted, tossing the transformer. Coiley caught it, and pushed the button on it, turning him into his superhero identity.

"Rally ho!" he shouted. "Grab on, Irving! I'm gonna jump!"

"But . . . . . but . . . . ." Irving said, dumbstruck. "But this is impossible!"

"I'll explain later! Just grab on!"

Irving nodded and he grabbed onto Coiley's shoulders and held on for all it was worth. Coiley immediately jumped, and Irving began screaming, figuring they would end up as smears on the pavement. Luckily that didn't happen. Once Coiley hit the ground, he sprang up a little, and then landed safely with Irving. The firemen then began blasting at the building with the hose.

"Are you, okay, Coiley?" FG asked.

"Yeah," Coiley said. "Just a little shaken up, but other than that, fine."

"How about you, Irv?" Fluey asked. "You all right?"

"Bit of the all right, all right!" Irving shouted, and then he fainted.

"He's all right," Chad replied, nodding.

After awhile, the fire was finally out. The cops approached the group, ready to arrest Chad and Irving.

"Are you pressing charges?" the chief asked.

"No, not really," Coiley said.

"Not really?!" Fluey shouted. "Whattaya mean not really?!"

"Take it easy, Fluey," Coiley replied. "Chad and Irving were just playing a joke. Not a very funny one, but they weren't serious."

"What?" FG asked.

"It's true," Chad said. "We may have warped senses of humor, but we're no psychopathic killers."

The cops shrugged and left. Once they did, Irving came to, and just stared at the Impossibles, who were now in their superhero get ups.

"Waaaaa-hahhhhhhh!" he shouted, panicked. "What are you . . . . . how did you . . . . . who _are_ you?!"

"See, this is why we couldn't sign you to our label," Coiley said. "We're really superheroes. We work for the Secret Security Headquarters, and our record label is just a set up. It doesn't really exist."

"And we couldn't explain why until now," Multi said. "Because you've seen us in our true identities."

"You won't tell anyone, will you?" Danalleah asked, worriedly.

"No, no, of course not," Chad said. "Believe me, mates, we're sorry for all the trouble we caused you."

"Yeah," Irving said. "We were just sore because you wouldn't sign us. But we really didn't mean any harm."

"Looks like we're going back to the drawing board," Chad said.

"Not necessarily," Coiley said. "Our friend, Phyllis, has a friend in the music business. He helps her with our record releases."

Coiley then wrote something on a piece of paper and handed it to Chad.

"Just take your demo to that address," he said. "And see how it goes from there."

"Hey, great!" Chad shouted. "Thanks a lot, bloke! You're all right."

"Bit of the all right, all right!" Irving said, and he and Chad bid their goodbyes, and walked off.

A couple of weeks later, the Impossibles and the girls were back in Megatropolis, enjoying a night off. They were all over at Coiley's house, watching a TV variety program, _The Fred Sillicon Show._

"Next up on our rilly big shew," Fred Sillicon said. "I'd like to introduce a new group. Dirrrrectly from London, England, singing their new hit single. Chad and Irving."

"Hey, guys, check this out!" Shawn shouted. "Looks like those two kooks made it after all."

"What do you know?" Fluey said, laughing.

"What are you guys watching?" Coiley's mother, Martha, asked, coming into the room. "Fred Sillicon? Who's that singing?"

"An English group," Coiley said. "They're name's Chad and Irving."

"Chad and Irving?" Martha asked. "Shouldn't that be Chad and Jeremy?"

"No, Mom," Coiley said. "Chad and Irving."

The End


End file.
